You Don’t Have to be Gay by Jeff Konrad is a very informal and insightful book for men who struggle with homosexuality.  The book is a compilation of letters written by Jeff to his friend, Mike, a man who was struggling with his identity and whether or not he was born gay.  Jeff Konrad offers encouragement and support to Mike that can be applied to any male who struggles with same-sex attraction.  He begins writing to a distraught Mike who is unhappy in his homosexual life.  Konrad takes the opportunity to share how he overcame homosexuality and what was underlying his own homosexual tendencies.

Konrad’s book is organized in such a way that an easy to follow progression is maintained.  He starts out by discussing the roots of homosexuality and provides great insight into why one may struggle with this issue.  This leads up to the steps to overcoming the homosexual struggle and how to be proactive in the healing process. The formatting of the book is very conversational making it reader friendly and easy to understand.  The strength is found in the clarity and broad spectrum of homosexuality that Jeff discusses. He pulls information from people such as Elizabeth Moberly, Leanne Payne – author of Crisis in Masculinity, and C.S. Lewis to provide evidence and support for his claims.

The topics discussed are very comprehensive and provide an informative look into the homosexual condition. Common questions that a struggling man may have are answered in these letters.  These answers are resourceful to males who struggle with homosexuality.  They are also beneficial for those who don’t struggle, by helping them understand and gain compassion for their friend or loved one who has same-sex attractions.  When I first read this book, I felt the author was addressing it to me.  The letters are filled with warmth, tenderness, and care which can be healing for a person who may have experienced scorn and disgust previously. (keep reading…)

•  What is the Day of Truth?

The Day of Truth was established to counter the promotion of the homosexual agenda and express an opposing viewpoint from a Christian perspective. It is a day in which Christian youth can minister the truth to their peers in a gracious and compassionate way, building relationships and bridges between Christians and non-Christians.

•  Why is it important for me to be involved?

As Christians, it is our responsibility to share with the world, in love, the biblical understanding and truth about human sexuality.  Homosexual behavior is contrary to God’s purposes and will in creation.  It is not His best for human kind.  So, as His followers we must be compassionate and motivated to reach our peers with truth in a respectful and loving way.  It is also important to share the message that there is hope and an alternative to the dead-end “born gay” message.  The Day of Truth provides the door for relationship and healthy dialogue between peers.

In the past, students who have attempted to speak against the promotion of the homosexual agenda have been censored or, in some cases, punished for their beliefs. It is important that students stand up for their First Amendment right to hear and speak the Truth about human sexuality in order to protect that freedom for future generations. The Day of Truth provides an opportunity to speak the Truth in love and have an honest conversation about homosexuality and at the same time publicly exercise your constitutional right to free speech.

•  Who is ADF?

The Alliance Defense Fund is a legal alliance defending the right to hear and speak the Truth through strategy, training, funding, and litigation.

•  Who is Exodus International?

Exodus International is the leading international Christian ministry focused on homosexuality. For over thirty years, Exodus has provided care and support to individuals wishing to leave homosexuality, as well as families, friends and churches. With 230 member organizations, the Exodus network is mobilizing the body of Christ to minister grace and truth to a world impacted by homosexuality.

•  Do I need to have authorization from my principal to hold this event?

While you are not required to have prior authorization, we would advise that you inform school officials of your intention as a courtesy. Most importantly, always be respectful when dealing with those in authority. If a principal, teacher, or someone else in authority asks you to stop, graciously request that they check with a supervisor first. If they continue to insist that you stop, stop immediately. Please call 1-800-TELL-ADF so that we can help resolve the situation quickly.

•  How many people across the country are participating in this project?

Over the past 4 years, we have had over 13,000 participants in the Day of Truth. This year, even more students are expected to take part in the Day of Truth, as news of this vital project continues to spread across the country. ADF has more than 1,200 allied attorneys who are available to assist you if you run into complications with school officials or pro-homosexual advocacy groups on your campus.

•  I’m the only one at my school participating, and I’m nervous about standing by myself.

Your willingness to participate in the Day of Truth shows great courage. Your level of activity can vary with what you feel most comfortable with.

•  What is the Day of Silence?

The Day of Silence is a national program of the Gay, Lesbian, Straight Education Network (GLSEN), which asks students to remain silent for an entire day to express their support for the promotion of the homosexual agenda in the public schools. Unlike the Day of Silence, the Day of Truth does not encourage students to engage in activities that are likely to disrupt the school’s academic mission.

•  Who can I call if I have questions or need help?

You can call 1-800-TELL-ADF if you have questions, need help, or are facing difficulties from the school administration. You can also e-mail ADF at .  For any questions on reaching out to peers call Exodus International at or email .

•  May I alter the materials to add my own style?

No. The t-shirts and other materials were designed to communicate a simple and respectful message. It is very important that the materials not be altered in any way, shape, or form, except where you are specifically told to supply information, such as on the sample press release.

•  What do I do if someone tries to stop me?

If a principal, teacher or someone else in authority asks you to stop, ask them graciously to check with a supervisor first. If this does not resolve the issue or the school official persists in confronting you, stop immediately and call 1-800-TELL-ADF so that we can resolve the situation quickly.

•  How can I reach my gay peers effectively?

It’s important to look at your gay-identified peers as people and not just see them for their sexual identity.  Once we get passed the whole sexual identity thing, we begin to see that the wall between (Christian heterosexuals and homosexuals) isn’t so high.  Gay people aren’t aliens from another planet that speak a foreign language and have customs that are completely different from our own.  Now you may be walking into unfamiliar territory, and indeed this usually is the case, but Christ promises He will be with us wherever we go (Matt. 28:20b).

Building relationships with your peers is most essential in effectively reaching them for the gospel.  When they know that you care for them as a person and want the best for them, healthy dialogue can occur.  Showing genuine concern and compassion for the gay community and those who may be secretly struggling at your school will open opportunities to minister.  Sharing the message that there is an alternative to the born-gay rhetoric in a redemptive and hope-filled manner is also important in reaching gay-identified peers.  There may be some who have accepted their homosexuality simply because they have heard no alternative.  Your message of hope may have a significant impact on those individuals.  Being compassionate and concerned for the well-being of those dealing with homosexuality may even open the door for those who have never shared their struggle with anyone.

And most importantly, trust the Holy Spirit and follow His leading!  It is the greatest value when you allow God to work through you and your own insecurities when reaching gay-identified students.

•  Where can I find more resources on reaching the homosexual community at my school?

Exodus International has a comprehensive library of resources that are geared towards youth and outreach at schools.  Visit www.exodusbooks.org for more information.

•  What are the various ways I can participate in the Day of Truth?

It can be as simple as wearing a Day of Truth T-shirt and passing out cards. We really encourage you to reach out to your peers in dialogue and sharing the truth with them in love and compassion.  Perhaps go a step further and invite them to your youth group, church, or campus ministry.

Our friends at Portland Fellowship (an Exodus member ministry) have launched an awesome web-based mentoring program at reachtruth.com.

Reach Truth is an online interactive program for men and women struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions.  This 20 week program includes personal mentoring, video teaching, thought provoking questions, and daily devotionals.

The cool thing about this program is that you can do it from anywhere in the world, and you can either request a mentor or “bring on with you.” In other words, if you have a parent, pastor, counselor, or friend of the family that you trust, you can ask them to be your ReachTruth mentor. They complete the program along with you, and it’s setup so they learn everything they need to know along the way. If you don’t have someone to take the journey with you, Reach Truth will provide a mentor for you.

To learn more, go to reachtruth.com and click on Travel Plan. Then to get started, click on Get Your Passport and fill out the form.

Here at Exodus Youth we’re committed to creating and providing the best resources for young people affected by homosexuality, and those who love them. The following resources are really helpful for youth who struggle with homosexuality or who just want to learn more. Click on any product image to purchase.

Truth & Tolerance DVD Meet Mike, Michelle, Zizi and David – four young people who struggled with same-sex attractions. Their personal testimonies of overcoming homosexuality through Christ highlight this compassionate, Biblical look at one of today’s most controversial subjects. DVD – $20 Main Segment – 25 minutes Other Features – 1 hour, 5 minute

The Map – CD-ROM This interactive disc takes you on the first steps of the journey out. Join Exodus leaders as they discuss the questions struggling youth ask most. Includes 20 personal lessons, video testimonies, and more! CD-ROM – $30.00

Youth Brochure This brochure is a great resource for teens who are struggling with their sexuality. Ten pages of helpful questions, personal stories and Biblical insights will guide students in discovering the truth about God, sexuality and change. Booklet – $1.25 10 or more – $1.00 each

101 Frequently Asked Questions About Homosexuality Here are compassionate, thorough and Biblical answers to the most often asked questions about homosexuality, fielded by an expert on the subject–Mike Haley. An outstanding resource for anyone wanting to know more about this controversial subject. Book – $11.99

Student Guide This workbook is the student’s companion to the Truth & Tolerance Leader Guide. Workbook – $10

Emotional Dependency for Guys This booklet helps guys understand why we’re sometimes drawn to unhealthy attachments, and gives practical advice for building Godly, meaningful friendships with other young men. Booklet – $3

Outreach Postcards These full-color postcards are a great way to energize a public outreach and get students thinking. Not intended for actual mailing. Pack of 20 – $10 4 designs, 2-sided

I met ‘Greg’ in high school through the drama team. He just came up to me one day and asked me to make him laugh, so I did. We were pretty much inseparable from then on.It was rare for me to find another guy with the same sense of humor, the same taste in movies and hobbies, so being together was really fun. And we hung out a lot. I always enjoyed spending time with Greg, so much so that I thought about him whenever I wasn’t with him. Whatever I got involved in, I thought of ways to get him involved, too.

We ended up going to the same college and taking a lot of classes together. As we drifted away from our high school friends, we got even closer. He was a really affectionate guy who had no problem hugging me, and sometimes we even wrestled around together. He was so considerate, calling me often and giving me silly little gifts or messages.

There was a down side to this seemingly fulfilling friendship, though. No matter how loving Greg was toward me, I always wanted more. Even if we spent a whole day together, for some reason I would go home at the end of it with a sort of frustrated, dissatisfied feeling. He was very social, and when I saw him laughing with other guys I felt jealous. I always worried, ‘What if he likes them more?’ (keep reading…)