exodus youth

The APA (American Psychiatric Association) has recently changed their stance on homosexuality.  This article was posted on :

The attempt to prove that homosexuality is determined biologically has been dealt a knockout punch. An American Psychological Association publication includes an admission that there’s no homosexual “gene” — meaning it’s not likely that homosexuals are born that way.

For decades, the APA has not considered homosexuality a psychological disorder, while other professionals in the field consider it to be a “gender-identity” problem. But the new statement, which appears in a brochure called “Answers to Your Questions for a Better Understanding of Sexual Orientation & Homosexuality,” states the following:

“There is no consensus among scientists about the exact reasons that an individual develops a heterosexual, bisexual, gay or lesbian orientation. Although much research has examined the possible genetic, hormonal, developmental, social, and cultural influences on sexual orientation, no findings have emerged that permit scientists to conclude that sexual orientation is determined by any particular factor or factors. Many think that nature and nurture both play complex roles….”

That contrasts with the APA’s statement in 1998: “There is considerable recent evidence to suggest that biology, including genetic or inborn hormonal factors, play a significant role in a person’s sexuality.”

With this admission that their former stance was wrong, will the APA respond differently to the stories of many people who have found freedom from a homosexual identity?  Hopefully this will be an open door for dialogue and respectful conversation on this topic.  The APA’s stance, whether it be embracing the gay gene theory or offering the possibility of change from a homosexual identity, has no bearing on my own beliefs.  No institution can discredit the fact that God has done a significant change in me.  He is the bearer of change in my life.  But, this is a great step in perhaps reducing the discrediting and judgmental attitudes many in the psychiatric world have against organizations such as Exodus.

It’s good to see the APA admitting the truth of our experiences.

The headline in the July 16th, 1993 issue of the Wall Street Journal read “Research Points Towards Gay Gene.” It was a headline that ran in papers across the nation. This instance was speaking about a research study a scientist by the name of Dean Hamer had conducted where he suggested that based on his findings, Homosexuality may actually be an inborn trait rather than learned.

This was not the first study of its kind, neither would it be the last. For years, scientists have been trying to discover the etiology (or cause) of same gender attractions.  Far from purely scientific the research has political consequences as well. Studies have shown that the public’s beliefs about the origins of sexual orientation are directly correlated to their attitude regarding homosexuality and serve to further political causes.  As such a lot of the science has fallen into the hands of political Ideologies. But apart from the politics of science,  what does the research actually say? Is homosexuality learned or innate? Furthermore, is change possible? (keep reading…)

Though it would be great to have a peaceful and civil Day of Truth event, many times that just isn’t the case.  You may well know that schools are becoming more and more biased when it comes to homosexual issues.  Homosexual propaganda is seeping into classroom lectures, and teachers and administrators alike are enforcing one-sided rhetoric.  By standing up for what you believe in and sharing the truth you will most likely experience some form of opposition.

I’ve heard countless stories from students who have participated in previous Day of Truth events that paint a rather harsh picture.  Students have been criticized and humiliated in front of their classmates by teachers - teachers who have fallen prey to pro-gay rhetoric and have lost understanding of what tolerance truly means.  Depending on your school atmosphere, you may very well experience the same kind of condemnation, anger, and judgment.  How will you handle the guards that may be thrown up to counteract your message, or the offensive attacks that may pop up when you participate? 

Experiencing pressure and personal attack because you want to dialogue and share your own beliefs on homosexuality can be discouraging and even scary.  It can be difficult to stand up for a belief that is constantly pounded by waves of skepticism, anger, and ideology that what you believe is a load of crock. (Read more)

Have you heard about the Day of Truth? You’ve probably seen announcements about it on the Exodus Youth website and perhaps in our . You may be wondering why is involved and if you are a student personally struggling with same-sex attractions you may think, “Why should I be involved in the Day of Truth?” If you’re feeling that your participation may not be very beneficial or necessary, that is far from the truth. We encourage you to be involved because you are a valuable and much needed asset to this event. Regardless of if you’re a student who secretly struggles or open about your struggle with same sex attractions, you have so much to offer. Your unique perspective and personal experience with homosexuality can be a much needed asset to helping other Day of Truth participants prepare for the conversations taking place at your school.

As an individual who is fighting same sex struggles and submitting this battle daily to Christ, you bring a different and much needed redemptive viewpoint to other DOT participants. They can learn a lot from your personal battle with this issue and gain a better understanding for those students they are actually trying to reach. You have rejected the world’s answer to homosexuality and are experiencing a new-found freedom through Jesus Christ. You are proof that there is another way! By participating in Day of Truth, you can be an advocate for other hurting and struggling students at your school.

Now, please don’t hear us saying that you should broadcast your battle with homosexuality to your whole school. This certainly may not be the time and place for that, but you don’t have to share your testimony in order to be effective. You can still be a great influence in helping bring understanding and compassion to this issue without divulging your own personal battle.

However, if you feel lead to share your story to the DOT participants and/or the student group you’re involved in, be bold in your freedom and share the redemption you’ve experienced through Christ. Be confident that you’re not alone and there are thousands of other students battling right alongside you all throughout the world. Your story can plant seeds of life into the hearts of the broken and help other Christians see the grace of God in a new and different way.

By participating in Day of Truth you can make a difference. Whether you feel lead to share your story or not, you can be an invaluable asset to other participants and the students they are reaching out to. Hopefully, the conversations will continue beyond this one day event and the Lord will use you to bring real answers and hope to a culture impacted by homosexuality.

If you’ve decided to participate in the Day of Truth, you know the importance of addressing homosexuality.  What a great way to bring a biblical response to this controversial and potentially divisive topic. Participating in this event is simply a time of intentional action: bringing awareness and offering a different viewpoint from the Day of Silence.  However, we must remember that observing one day of intentionality isn’t going to bring all the gay-identified students to desire change.  This one-day event merely provides the groundwork and opens opportunities to share the life-changing power and love of Jesus Christ.

Building Bridges and Crossing Them
Participation in the Day of Truth (DoT) can be the open door to building relationships with those on the “other side” of this conversation.  As you talk to other students, DoT can be a gateway for connecting with gay-identified peers or those who are secretly struggling in your school.  As you begin “an honest discussion about homosexuality”, you are showing them that you care about them as individuals and their relationship with Christ.

(keep reading…)

by Jayson Graves

Could you use some help with resisting temptation? Do you ever struggle with temptation feeling or seeming like sin in and of itself? Well, the good news is, there’s plenty more like you, myself included. And there’s also hope and help available to you. I know I can relate with feeling like this and so can many of my counseling clients and I’d like to give you a few tips that might bring clarity and hope and free you up to live the abundant life God intends for you.

Temptation vs. Sin
For me, this started to happen once I realized that just because something was a temptation for me, that didn’t mean I was in sin. Sin (or ‘mistakes’ against God) has to do with willful actions and thoughts…not simply being presented with the idea of these things. There’s a line between thinking and doing and while the former can lead to the latter, it doesn’t have to. I have struggled with this because sometimes the thoughts can seem so real. I’ve gotten down on myself because I even had these thoughts in the first place and bought into the lie that there was something wrong with me. Sound familiar? It’s called false shame and it’s the enemy’s biggest trick.

(keep reading…)

With so much misinformation in the media today about homosexuality, it’s no wonder that those seeking to leave homosexuality are faced with so much misunderstanding. A popular theory in pop culture today seems to be that a person with same gender attractions would naturally accept and live happily with their sexuality was it not for bigoted, narrow-minded homophobes who constantly make life impossible for gay men and women. That if only society would cease being so intolerant, everyone would be at peace with whatever sexuality they developed and just live without giving it any thought…like someone being left handed or preferring green over blue.

But as we know, sexuality is complicated and trying to reduce it to a neat sound bite only leaves us with more questions than answers. In actuality, the truth lies more to the middle, which should come as no surprise. It’s true that homophobia is alive and well today; groups like the Westborough Baptist church aren’t making the load easier for anybody. I imagine that there are scores of men and women living scared and lonely lives for fear of being rejected by their friends and family. But the opposite is also true, there are scores of men and women who once accepted homosexuality and have since left that behind…for reasons having nothing to do with fear of rejection.

In fact quite the opposite. Many of the people I’ve met over the years used to be openly gay, some were gay activists, and others lived with their partners for years. If they were seeking acceptance surely becoming “ex-gay” (as some have labeled us) was not the way. Those of us who have walked out of homosexuality face a double rejection as many even in the church as well as in the secular and pro-gay world question the validity of our change. So why change? (keep reading…)

I stood in an empty starbucks with my friend Jenny. We were both assigned the sunday opening shift of a newly opened store and our third partner called in sick leaving us alone. She noticed I had been changing over the recent months but not in a positive way. Whereas I was always happy and giddy making jokes and singing cheezy christian songs to make her laugh… now I was growing increasingly dark and detached. As a friend she demanded to know why I was so distant. It was my darkest secret and only one other person knew. My palms sweaty, gripping the aluminum counter, eyes shuffling about the floor, I finally uttered the words that caused me so much pain to admit.

“Jenny,” I said. “I’m Gay.”

“Alright…” she replied, “but do you want to be gay?” No one had ever asked me that before. No one ever gave me that choice. I knew I wasn’t born gay, but somehow I developed homosexual attractions and now I couldn’t make them go away. (keep reading…)

From ChristianPost.com:

In the aftermath of the passage of California’s Proposition 8, Newsweek and Hollywood are the latest players to launch their attacks on traditional marriage supporters and the biblical case against homosexuality.

And Christians are taking issue with the misconceptions, factual errors and holes in the arguments being presented in popular public spheres.

Read this article >>

You can also check out Exodus VP Randy Thomas’s thoughts on his blog.

A common roadblock in the pursuit of purity is the accountability relationship that starts off with good intentions but quickly fizzles out. Ever get depressed and discouraged by simply hashing over the same habitual sins over and over–even in the company of supportive Brothers or Sisters in Christ?

What if accountability was meant to be more than that? Check out this great article over at the Boundless webzine:

Our friends at Portland Fellowship (an Exodus member ministry) have launched an awesome web-based mentoring program at reachtruth.com.

Reach Truth is an online interactive program for men and women struggling with unwanted same-sex attractions.  This 20 week program includes personal mentoring, video teaching, thought provoking questions, and daily devotionals.

The cool thing about this program is that you can do it from anywhere in the world, and you can either request a mentor or “bring on with you.” In other words, if you have a parent, pastor, counselor, or friend of the family that you trust, you can ask them to be your ReachTruth mentor. They complete the program along with you, and it’s setup so they learn everything they need to know along the way. If you don’t have someone to take the journey with you, Reach Truth will provide a mentor for you.

To learn more, go to reachtruth.com and click on Travel Plan. Then to get started, click on Get Your Passport and fill out the form.

A large church in Michigan was the target of a Sunday-morning demonstration by gay activists which quickly got out of control:

The disruption came from a group that calls itself Bash Back, and involved demonstrations outside the church and inside the sanctuary while services were under way, said Mt. Hope Church communications director David Williams.

Members of the group inside the church shouted pro-gay slogans, threw leaflets, unfurled a banner and pulled a fire alarm, then hastily departed, Williams said. There were no injuries, he said.

(keep reading…)

On Sunday, November 9th, about 100 protesters showed up outside the First Baptist Church of Dallas to demonstrate against the weekly sermon entitled, “Why Gay is Not O.K.”

Carrying signs bearing the words “I’m Gay and It’s OK” and “Christ Taught Love Not Hate,” the protesters lined both sides of San Jacinto Street in front of the downtown church.

They sang “Jesus Loves Me” and cheered when passing motorists honked their horns and waved in support.

(keep reading…)

Are men really pigs? Is there anything good about male sexuality? Looking at secular and religious attitudes on the subject, you wouldn’t think so. But what if there is something glorious and God-intended in the way men are wired for sex and relationships?

Read my latest article for Boundless.

I had a friend in high-school who was my first best-friend.  We spent all of our free time together.  For the first time in my life, I felt loved and accepted for who I was. This was an exciting time for me.  I grew close to this friend and to her family.  There were times soon after my parents’ divorce that I didn’t go home for days, spending more and more time at my friend’s house.  We were not in a lesbian relationship, but when my mom asked me if my friend and I were homosexually involved, I had to admit to myself that I wished we were.  If we were a “couple,” then she would never leave me and I would always feel the thrill of having someone truly care about me and value me as a person.

(keep reading…)

If I had a dime for every time a young woman questions her sexuality, I could easily pay for my children’s future college tuition.  And that would be sending them to a private school, not a community college.  You may wonder what is causing this unhealthy trend among teens and young women.  When you live in a sex-saturated culture like we do, with sexual images inundating us on TV, in movies and magazines, it is no wonder that sex becomes a constant theme to analyze, ponder and generally obsess over.

(keep reading…)

Are you struggling with pornography? Is this something you wish wasn’t in your life but you just can’t seem to conquer it? Well, you’re not alone.

Personally, I can relate with that feeling of being trapped. I’ve been there and I’ve found ways to get beyond that place of being trapped. With God’s help, there is hope for you, like there was hope for me.

There are a few key things to realize and steps to take…allow me share a few of these things that helped me and countless others. (keep reading…)

LiLo and her friend Samantha

What happened to the cute freckle-faced girl from The Parent Trap?  I don’t know Lindsay Lohan or any of the interpersonal dynamics that shaped her life.  My knowledge of Lindsay is limited to what I’ve learned through the media.  From that perspective, I will offer my point-of-view on LiLo’s chaotic life leading up to her relationship with Samantha Ronson.

Lindsay’s father was in jail for a significant portion of her childhood.  She’s now seeking a protective order against him.  It’s clear that LiLo doesn’t like MiLo.  And, although Michael Lohan now professes faith in Jesus and works with Teen Challenge, being a convicted felon didn’t make him much of a role model, at least not from Lindsay’s viewpoint. Parental role models are crucial in helping us develop into secure adults.  They provide boundaries for us and teach us how to relate to the outside world.  When those role models are insecure with themselves (or absent altogether), it is difficult for them to provide us with the direction we need.  (keep reading…)

One of life’s greatest challenges for me has been to be comfortable in my own feminine skin. I am finding that many women, whether they have struggled with same-sex attraction or not, have been frustrated with and had serious questions regarding what being a “Woman” means. If you happen to struggle with lesbianism, please know that you are not alone in dealing with the awkward, difficult, and often distressing realities of being female…feminine.

Throughout childhood and adolescence I steered clear of everything “girly.” No dolls or dresses for me. Instead of sweet nicknames like “Princess” I was the Great Green Frog, Sausage Legs, Lester, Pack Mule, and best of all Lumpy when I was going thru that awkward stage of early adolescence. The last time I was mistaken for my mother’s son was when I was a sophomore in college.

I think part of my problem has been that I am competitive by nature. If I didn’t have a shot at being the best, why play. As for beauty, brains and brawn: I did well in school. I was strong as an ox, some said, and did well in competitive swimming. Yet, I knew I was never going to be pretty so why even try. In fact it made me feel better to degrade anything feminine. I was strong and confident on the inside and it did not matter what I looked like on the outside. I was not going to make a big fuss just to please others who might be looking at me. (keep reading…)

I heard Katy Perry’s song “I Kissed a Girl (And I Liked It)”.  I love upbeat, care-free songs with catchy tunes.  It reminds me of high-school summers, hanging out with friends and riding the bus to the beach.  Like most people, I listen to music for the music.    When I was a teenager, I didn’t know the words to half the songs I heard.  The other half, I sang along with when they played on the radio, because it was fun and I liked the sound.  So what is the big deal if Katy sings that she kissed a girl?  I don’t listen for the lyrics, I listen for the music.  That’s why they call it music.

(keep reading…)